The Ten Lies I Tell Myself When Dieting (or Trying to Avoid It)

By Shannon Scopano

 

 

 

Disclaimer

Since most of the people reading this don't know me I would like to introduce myself.  I am 35 and just realized that I am overweight.  I have very high self-esteem and am very confident in myself.  I am also a self-certified smarty pants.  I deal with everything head on and am very realistic; excuses are not allowed…anymore.  I hope that you take the below as it is meant to be; my self-satirical.  So if you are looking for a positive, heart-warming story I would recommend you stop here.  However, if you would like a good laugh (with a small dose of my reality check) then by all means, continue.

 

And now to the fun…

Since my weight loss journey with the News Herald's Lighten Up program is just beginning, I thought I would let you in on all my dieting lies.  After all, the first step to recovery is admitting the problem.  Or in this case, coming face-to-face with the scale.

 

It's just a few pounds.

It was just a few pounds, many times over.  Gaining two pounds is no big deal except I have gained two pounds, 20 times, consecutively. 

 

I'll just have one or one more little bite won't hurt.

HA!!! I know me and I can't take just one bite, EVER! My willpower is essentially nonexistent when it comes to food. It's really a slippery slope in my world.

 

I'll just pre-portion out the chips, pretzels, etc.

This is partially helpful, kinda.  Yes I know how to count but if a chip is broken, even a tiny bit, then it doesn't count as a whole chip.  Other chips then must be added to make up for this error.  In the end my single portion is more like 1.5. 

 

Diet Coke is not bad for me

I don't care if this is wrong; I love Diet Coke and always will.

 

If I dab the grease off it will reduce the fat and calories.

Okay, this is true.  However, maybe just not eating anything that has that much grease on it would be better.  Especially since this would send me into a heartburn tornado like you have never known. 

 

I love vegetables!

A total and complete lie!  I LIKE some vegetables but I think love is too strong of a word.

 

I'll take the stairs.

Only if there is no elevator available is this statement ever true. 

 

I'm not THAT overweight.

I would compare myself to many large mammals on the earth but I shall refrain.  I have seen pictures of myself and I could stand to lose a few (40) pounds. In addition to that, at my weigh in last Saturday I discovered that I'm 40% body fat!!!  When did that happen?!  I believe that was the wakeup call I needed.

 

The healthy version is just as good, if not better, than the full fat version.

Seriously?!  It's edible, okay, maybe even good at best, but better?! I think not.

 

I can do it on my own.

In theory maybe, but in reality, no.   I need support all around me and motivation.  I have my family, friends, co-workers and all the readers of the News Herald to help me and I need that.  If I really could do this on my own then I'm sure I would have already.  So, Thanks, in advance, for all your support.

 

My inspiration for this blog is from 10 Lies We Tell Ourselves When We Want to Lose Weight

by Emily Abbate